C-C-C-Cr-uh-Crambooo

I love this guy! Stuttering, can't remember the words, only has two strings on his guitar--but he doesn't know the difference, only that he loves to sing. We should all be so wise. Do what you love, no matter what!

Loss

We understand loss of loved ones who pass on to the next plane of existence. We cannot explain the grief but we understand it. But the loss of one who was longed for, lived for? The loss of one we hoped to know; spent untold years pondering with great expectation. The loss of one we found but were unable to connect with. The loss of one who still lives, breathes the same air. We cannot understand it--only be crushed under it.

It's A Good Thing

Who loves Facebook. I do. I do. I think I'm getting the hang of it now. So many people are popping up that I haven't seen in I don't know when. Childhood friends that I haven't seen in 15 years. People who I forgot were completely drop dead hilariously funny. People whose jokes were so corny, you were green around the gills for the next hour. People who haven't changed a single bit. People who've change a lot. People that I remember fondly. People I have less than fond memories of. People that I purposely forgot about. People I had forgotten I'd forgotten about. People I hoped I would see again. People I never thought I would see again. People I'm ecstatic to see again. People I'm not so ecstatic to see again. People I was glad I would never see again.

Finding that so many people who are exactly as they were when we parted ways is so comforting. Good, bad or otherwise, a nostalgia surrounds me. Friends that I knew who were good, are really great now. Those who weren't so good, I remember, were young enough that they weren't all bad, either. House parties with friends and friends of friends and ex's and ex's-to-be. Guys I had crushes on who turned out to like the guy I was dating. Girls who were my besties who turned out wanted to date me. Everybody--who they were and who they turned out to be couldn't be any better if somebody paid them. I could not be any more giddy.

So, here's to all the people I've ever known, that I know now or that I have yet to know. Thank you for being who you are. There's no greater gift in this world to others or to yourself. And here's to Facebook for reuniting us all with our fondest memories. In the words of the former Martha Stewart, "It's a good thing."

Facebook is toying with me...

anybody here use the dreaded FB? i dare not say its name for fear that it will find me. removal of all profiles with any information pertaining to myself has been my priority over the past couple of years. for the past few months, there has been pressure to join this place called facebook. frankly, it took long enought to get my blogspot in order--not so interested in something else. the time investment is a bit much--first you have to figure it out, then you get addicted, then you get bored with it--we all know how it works. so i finally succumb to the clamoring voices waving me in and started a profile yesterday. first thing, i found at least four people i had been wondering about over the years. i found lots more that i hadn't been wondering about but old faces bring back fond memories or at least memories that we can smile about given accumulated experience. i have to say that impressed me a little. now, as is assumed by all these "networking" sites, i have to set up a profile. facebook is no myspace, let me tell you. you've got your "wall" and your "profile" and who the hell can tell one from the other?! trying to add music or make sense of notes vs. news is ridiculous. they pull you in with the connections and then hook you with the "hey, look this cool app". not mentioning that it will be hell to add it to your page--if you figure it out at all. i knew i didn't want to do this whole thing--not that i'm not happy to have found some people whom i deem quite valuable. i do. maybe i can tuck my refound friends under my arm and if i just back away slowly, facebook will leave me alone...

right. Stacy L. Davis's Profile Create Your Badge

Bloomers, Bloomers, Bloomers

Hi, All!!! I am finishing up the semester and I'm tired like I flew all the way here!! I am happy to say that my grades are terrific and did I mention that I am thoroughly exhausted?

N-sk-ways...I am so sorry to have been away for such a long time. I have so enjoyed everyone's company in the cactus and succulent plant Fam and I have missed all of you terribly. Now, that we are past apologies, on to a new post. I have never joined in on the Bloomin' Tuesday fun but it just so happens that my wonderful cellmate--I mean coworker Val has the most magnificent Sulcorebutia rauschii which bloomed the most delectable blooms I believe I've ever seen. It was so beautiful, you had to restrain yourself from popping it off and devouring it that very moment you wanted so desperately to possess it. She caught some dynamic photos and let me share with everyone since she was such the proud Mom. So, I hope that all of you will forgive me for being away so long and because it's Friday and not Tuesday. Be creative with me and join me in celebrating Bloomin Tuesday on a day other than Tuesday!! Who couldn't use an eye-bathingly beautiful break from all the focus on swine flu?!! Special Thanks to my friend Val for providing our very special guest for this post. Can't wait to visit all the blogs and catch up with everyone.

Happy to be Ashamed

i am aware that i have been away for some time. aside from homework, i've done little more than wade hip deep in election coverage like the rest of the world. when this two year knock-down drag-out began, i was torn between the democratic candidates. however, since Kansas was not a primary state, that was settled for me. i watched and i read and i read and i watched everything i possibly could. i thought, wow, a person of color got the candidacy. i talked with my children about what this all meant. i got to watch as our discussions coaxed their minds into forming solid, arguable ideas about politics and race. i got to listen to recounts of discourses they'd had with their friends who were either too young to understand or, sadly, already apathetic toward what was going on in our nation. i was even more proud and comforted that two children who were concerned and aware would be released into society soon.


my neighborhood growing up on the Kansas side of Kansas City was one that essentially shielded me from racism. interracial couples (of which i am a product) (black/white and black/asian) and their children lived house to house with white families and black families and blended families and their children alike. we all attended each other's birthday parties and family functions. i didn't understand what racism was even after i was called a "nigger" for having a membership at a swimming pool that i never realized was all white. as i grew into high school and faced someone trying to force me to say whether i "considered" myself white or black did I get the mildest of inklings about what this racism thing was. i used to think the things i would hear were just stories--it didn't truly exist anymore and i would say so right to the faces of those who told me. only when i entered the workforce did i get the shock of my life. racism was alive, well and was red-orange in color. however, even still, it was not a thing that was blatant or that could be called such without somebody instantly discrediting you for not being able to describe the action with words or using the phrase "i have black friends" or, somehow, because you are black and are therefore not objective.


that all changed, however, when a man of color won nomination for president from one half of the recognized political "power" parties in our country. unabashed, true, red-orange colored racism began to patrol the streets in the daylight like it had every moral obligation to do so. for example: a friend of mine (who is a black woman) was pumping gas one evening when a middle aged white man walked over to her and said, "you know these gas prices aren't bush's fault. obama couldn't do any better." to which she replied, "well, he couldn't do any worse." (she's always doing stuff like that.) i have watched while companies in the affluent neighborhood in which i work have systematically eliminated the few black people they had from their staffs. i said companie"s" not company. "dumb nigger" was printed on a receipt from a store in this same neighborhood giving written proof of the prevailing feelings of the community at large.


i would no longer discuss my feelings about the upcoming election with family and friends because as accomplished and eloquent and Democrat as Senator Obama is i just could not believe that this country was ready to elect a man of color. i admitted to my white, middle-aged, women coworkers that even though they were excited, i did not believe that this country was ready for a black president nor did i believe that at 36 years old would i see one in my lifetime other than on reruns of "24". i wanted to believe. i really, really wanted to believe but i was not prepared to face the utter disappointment and humiliation that would come with defeat. i could only silently hope.


i am now unabashedly pleased to admit that i was wrong. i am giddy to say that i am ashamed of myself for not trusting in the greater good. i am handily ready to return my trust into the hands of my nation's multi-colored people. i am happy to humbly request the forgiveness of my country and that of President-elect Obama. i am happy.

victory. a small one, however, victory nonetheless. since home depot sent me that $20 card without even reading my complaint i decided to exact a little justice of my own. deciding that i just could not allow all the cries go unheard from the succulents hidden under shelves where no light could warm and feed them. this particular shipment had been there almost 3 weeks because i had been in twice a week to look at them and they were drowning each time i saw them. leaves were dropping; horrible odors of mildew and rot were emanating from the majority; and at this visit the dirt had turned to brick and separted from their plastic cups. i asked three different people for help with the succulents. the third guy yukked that they looked healthy to him but he didn't really know anything about them and the garden person would be in tomorrow and had one foot in front of the other walking away. then can i speak to the manager, i asked. a barely contained look of surprise emanated from his awkward but youthfully handsome face. you mean the assistant manager, he inquired. whomever. well, i'm the garden manager and i'll go ahead and give you 50% off. all of them, i hoped carefully as if i honestly didn't care. oh, yes, yes. i'll walk you up front if you're ready. of course, lead the way. he began to hm, haw, "do you have any other shopping to do?" i could see that he was going to try to disappear before i got to the register leaving me appearing to be some mad plant lady so "no, thank you." was my response.

when we got to the register, he announced to the girl that she should take half off all the plants. she looked at him in dumb amazement like she had no idea what he was saying. she asked him if it was true and he responded positively. as i unloaded my cart of eight happily sighing baby plants a tiny blond girl asked "oh, are those venus flytraps?" i know with whom i deal here at Home Depot so it was just too easy to say something that would put on display the obvious lack of knowledge the staff possess. "no, just succulents" was my response of decorum. a lady lounging on the next register began to question him. "who are you. what's your position? what's your name, rank, serial number? just want to be sure you had authorization to do that?" i turned to her and asked "why is that?" she began to explain that she wasn't from this store and just as she opened her mouth to explain i turned my back. i assume she got the picture. it was inappropriate for her to question him in front of a customer, firstly. secondly, it was plain rude to embarass him in front of coworkers and customers. i don't know if she was smart enough to get it or not--and i don't care, truthfully. she must have understood because she took over and carefully boxed up my little lovlies. i thanked them and very slowly and very deliberately began my walk from the store. there were strange looks from some who had heard parts of the exchange. i held my head just a little higher. take that home depot. i took my free plants and went home.